Coping With Motherhood.

So the title of this post seems a little dismal, but I can't skip the details of this journey called motherhood. Strap in for the ride, folks!

Let me just say that I have wanted to be a mom for literally my entire life. I always, always, always planned to stay home with my kiddos & live in the bliss of life as a full-time stay-at-home mom. Well, things don't always go as planned. Since my husband is working on his master's degree, I work full-time. And I absolutely love it.

When our sweet baby G came, I was very anxious to go back to working & being away from such a tiny, perfect little soul. Now that I am back to my "regular" schedule, I feel comfortable with life as a working mom.

In the spirit of transparency, I'll be frank: I have struggled emotionally since my boy was born. I have tried to manage it on my own, but I have come to a crossroads with my feelings & it's time for me to get some help. This is very hard for me to even admit to myself, much less anyone else. But I know that other mamas may see this & feel comfort. So I'll lay it all on the line.

Dealing with a crying little one is tough & work is my escape. I've felt an immense amount of shame for feeling this way, but it is what it is. I admire stay-at-home moms so much because I genuinely don't know if I could handle it. Of course I love my baby & want only the best for him, but sometimes I just cannot seem to comfort him, & my anxiety goes through the roof. For anyone who is feeling this way, know this: it's okay to want to have some alone time, it's okay to ask for help, & it is okay to put you before baby.

I didn't know what I was getting into with this whole motherhood gig, but let me say that I wouldn't change the way things are for anything. I prioritize my emotional & mental health so that when I am home with my baby, I can be okay. I definitely still have a ways to go with my patience, but I am slowly learning how to do it.

I know so many moms can just jump right in and do it, but if you are the mom who needs a little extra help, it is okay. Don't ignore those feelings, because it won't go away without support from others.

Life is constantly changing, & your little babies won't be that way for long. Do what you can to enjoy the ride! I know that being the best mom for my little G means that I need to have plenty of "me" time, & that working is okay. For others, it may be that you need to quit working so that you can put all your energy into baby. Whatever it is, be the best mama you can be!